Sunday, November 28, 2010

34 Months (deux)

Quinn has reached the age of the terrible twos. Yes, she has been terrific for some time now but more and more often nowadays, her incessant whine tends to take over. She's a stubborn little chicken. We thought Lucas was stubborn in his younger years but that kid has nothing on my Quinnita. If she doesn't want to do something, then you are simply out of luck. You can fight her and try to push her around or threaten her and take her prize blankie away, that girl will not give it up without screeching at the top of her lungs. During those moments of wear, it's a struggle to say the least.

We called them the terrific twos for Lucas and it took a year for us to reach the terrible part (are we still going?). I guess we're getting close to three with Quinn so maybe she's just an early developer. I'm hardly surprised because we knew that she was going to let us know how she felt right from the get-go. It can be frustrating at times, especially when she doesn't want to say goodbye to you as if you were the least of all her worries. Try to get a kiss or a hug out of her before stepping out the door, once she's made up her mind that you ain't getting one, and it's a struggle. Yet, at those times when you need a straight answer out of her, you know that what she's telling you is the absolute truth. It's refreshing to have that because that's how we are trying to teach our children to communicate and those lessons are a burdensome competetion against a false and secretive culture.

I've always had a difficult time being open and honest with my feelings. One of the reasons that I fell in love with Christina was that she was so honest herself and she demanded that I give her that same respect back. I'd been able to squirm my way through life, never actually getting caught under the hammer but I really needed to challenge that aspect of my personality in order to grow into a more complete human being, which was something that I truly longed for but never had much guidance toward up until then. So when we took the plunge into the deep end of the pool, whether or not we even knew how to swim, and placed these children on our shoulders, we were either going to drown and take their souls down with us or we would learn how to tread water and buoy their lives. I immediately made a determination to be honest with them about the truly important details of life. They needed to trust me and I had to follow that up with action. Honesty lies in our hearts and the more that I open my heart to Christina and the children, the more we form together into a cohesive family unit that is comfortable and secure with one another. That's all I want from them. They may not always come to me with smiles upon their faces and I may not always have the exact words that they need for whatever they're dealing with but the more that I can provide my true self for their benefit, then the outcome will be one of comfort.

Quinn can be a stubborn as she wants to be, as far as I'm concerned. It's going to be a struggle for me and Christina to deal with at times but when that hard shell of arrogance sheds away and her soft nature needs a shoulder to cry on, I hope that I have helped create an environment where she knows that she only has to turn my way and my arms will be wide open.

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